Words from married wise men...

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

-David Bissonette

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.

-Sacha Guitry

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.

-Anonymous

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is,"What does a woman want?"

-Dumas

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.

-Sigmund Freud

'Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.'

-Anonymous

'There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.'

-Sam Kinison

'I've had bad luck with both my wives.

The first one left me, and the second one didn't.'

-James Holt McGavra

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.

-Patrick Murra

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once....

-Nash

You know what I did before I married?

Anything I wanted to.

-Anonymous

My wife and I were happy for twenty years.

Then we met.

-Henny Youngman

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

-Rodney Dangerfield

A man inserted an 'ad' in the cl-assifieds: 'Wife wanted'. Next day he received a hundred letters.

They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.'

-Anonymous

First Guy (proudly): 'My wife's an angel!'
Second Guy: 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'

-Anonymous

SEND THIS TO ALL THE GUYS TO GIVE THEM A GOOD LAUGH......AND TO THOSE LADIES WITH A SENSE OF HUMOR WHO CAN HANDLE IT!