Address kaha ka...

Ek faqir maangne ke liye masjid ke baahar baitha raha...

Sab namaazi aankh bacha kar chale Gaye...

Usey kuch Na mila...

Woh phir church Gaya, phir mandir aur phir gurudware...

Lekin usko kissi ne kuch Na diya...

Aakhir ek maikhane ke baahar aakar baith Gaya...

Jo sharabi nikalta uske katorey mein kuch daal deta...

Uska katora noton se bhar Gaya...

Faqir bola, "wah mere khuda...!!

Rahtey kahaan ho aur address kahaan ka dete ho.... "

- LoveNismi ( Ansh Rav)

Be Your Own Boss, Take Action

Be Your Own Boss, Take Action
There is a big difference between wanting to become your own boss, and actually becoming your own boss. Find out what you need to know and overcome to make your dreams a reality

Being a Entrepreneur
To be a successful entrepreneur you will need a good idea, money, a little luck, and hard work (lots of it). 90 % of the most successful people fail the most, meaning you must first lose something (your initial investment) before you gain anything (profits, equity, etc.).

Women Entrepreneurs
Somehow even before I start this topic what goes in my mind is that who all would be interested in reading about woman entrepreneurs. Intuition and experience says it'll be 80% women, reason being men do not find any interest in the growth aspects of women. This is to the extent of not even getting interested in reading about topics related to progress of women. This might sound chauvinistic, but no amount of advancement is able to change the basic psychology of males.

- LoveNismi ( Ansh Rav)

just to laugh

Lighter side of Poems........To make U Smile

Roses are red, violets are blue
Monkeys like you.. should be kept in the zoo.

Don't feel so angry, you will find me there too
Not in a cage but laughing at you...

Twinkle Twinkle little star
You should know what you are
And once you know what you are
Mental hospital is not so far.

The rain makes all things beautiful.
The grass and flowers too.
If rain makes all things beautiful
Why doesn't it rain on you?

I wrote your name on sand it got washed.
I wrote your name in air, it was blown away.
then ~ I wrote your name on my heart And....
I got a heart attack straight away...

God saw me hungry, HE created pizza.
HE saw me thirsty, HE created Pepsi
HE saw me in dark, HE created light
HE saw me without problems, HE created YOU.

- LoveNismi ( Ansh Rav )

Mera Bharat Mahaan???

Dear All,
Just think once & act.
Salary & Govt. Concessions for a Member of Parliament (MP)
Monthly Salary : 12,000
Expense for Constitution per month : 10,000
Office expenditure per month : 14,000
Traveling concession (Rs. 8 per km) : 48,000 ( eg.For a visit from kerala to Delhi & return: 6000 km)
Daily DA TA during parliament meets : 500/day
Charge for 1 class (A/C) in train: Free (For any number of times) (All over India )
Charge for Business Class in flights : Free for 40 trips / year (With wife or P.A.)
Rent for MP hostel at Delhi : Free
lectricity costs at home : Free up to 50,000 units
Local phone call charge : Free up to 1 ,70,000 calls.
TOTAL expense for a MP [having no qualification] per year : 32,00,000[i.e . 2.66 lakh/month]
TOTAL expense for 5 years : 1,60,00,000
For 534 MPs, the expense for 5 years :8,54,40,00,000 (nearly 855 crores)
AND THE PRIME MINISTER IS ASKING THE HIGHLY QUALIFIED, OUT PERFORMING CEOs TO CUT DOWN THEIR SALARIES…..
This is how all our tax money is been swallowed and price hike on our regular commodities...
And this is the present condition of our country:
855 crores could make their life livable !!
Think of the great democracy we have..............
PLEASE FORWARD THIS MESSAGE TO ALL REAL CITIZENSOF INDIA ....
but,
STILL Proud to be INDIAN
I know hitting a delete button is easier.......bt........try 2 press fwd button 2 make people aware of it!
And after all this............. MERA DESH MAHAAN or should be say MERE NETA MAHAAN….
- LoveNIsmi ( Ansh Rav)

Daddy

HOW A SON/DAUGHTER THINKS OF HIS/HER DADDY AT DIFFERENT AGES:

At 4 Years My daddy is great.

At 6 Years My daddy knows everybody.

At 10 Years My daddy is good but is short tempered

At 12 Years My daddy was very nice to me when I was young.

At 14 Years My daddy is getting fastidious.

At 16 Years My daddy is not in line with the current times.

At 18 Years My daddy is becoming increasingly cranky.

At 20 Years Oh! Its becoming difficult to tolerate daddy.

Wonder how Mother puts up with him.

At 25 Years Daddy is objecting to everything.

At 30 Years It's becoming difficult to manage my son.

I was so scared of my father when I was young.

At 40 Years Daddy brought me up with so much discipline.

Even I should do the same.

At 45 Years I am baffled as to how my daddy brought us up.

At 50 Years My daddy faced so many hardships to bring us up.

I am unable to manage a single son.

At 55 Years My daddy was so far sighted and planned so many things for us.

He is one of his kind and unique.

At 60 Years My daddy is great.

Thus, it took 56 years to complete the cycle and come back to the 1st. stage. Realize the true value of your parents before its too late.

- LoveNismi ( Ansh Rav)

LOVE LETTER WITH DEFFRECE

A different Love letter and a beautiful reply to it.

A teenage college guy sent a love letter (in Q/A format) to his classmate.

My Dearest Reshma,

Please answer the following questionnaire. For Options

(A) 10 marks, (b) 5marks and (c) 3 marks.

**********

1) Whenever you enter the class room, your sight always falls on me because:

(a) of love (b) you couldn't control seeing me (c) really ... am I doing it?

**********

2) Whenever professor cracks joke, you laugh and turn and look at me because:

(a) you always like to see me smiling (b) you are testing whether I like jokes (c) you are attracted by my smile

**********

3) When you were singing in the class, I entered and immediately you stopped singing because:

(a) you are so coy to sing before me (b) my presence influenced you (c) you feared that whether I'll like your Song

**********

4) When you were showing your childhood photo, when I asked for it, you hide it because:

(a) you felt ashamed (b) you felt uneasy (c) you don't know

**********

5) During trekking, myself and my friend gave you hand for lifting you and you took only my friend's because:

(a) you enjoyed my disappointment (b) you won't feel leaving my hand after grabbing (c) you don't know

**********

6) You were waiting yesterday for bus and didn't get into your bus...

(a) you were waiting for me (b) you were dreaming about me and didn't notice the bus (c) that bus was

crowded

**********

7) You introduced me to your parents when they came to college because:
(a) I am going to be your groom (b) you just want to know what your parents think about me (c) just you felt like introducing me to them
**********

8) I told that I like girls wearing roses. Next day, you came with a rose on your head because:
(a) to fulfill my wish (b) you like roses (c) by chance you got a rose
**********

9) On that day, it was my birthday. you too came to temple early at 6:00 A.M because:
(a) you want to pray along with me (b) you want to meet me before any one could meet on my birthday (c) you want to wish me at temple because you are spiritual.
**********

If you have scored more than 40, then you are loving me. Don't delay in expressing it.
If you have scored between 30 and 40, love is budding in your heart and it's getting ready to bloom. If you have scored less than 30, you are in confusion whether to love me or not.
Eagerly awaiting your reply..
Love, Aakash
*********************

Reshma's reply letter was also in Q/A format........
Aakash,
Please answer the following Yes/No questionnaire.
**********

1) If somebody sits in the first row, normally people entering the class, sees them.
(a) Yes (b) No
**********

2) If a girl laughs and looks anyone, is it love?
(a) Yes (b) No
**********

3) While singing, if somebody forgets lines of the songs, will he/she stop singing or not?
(a) Yes (b) No
**********

4) I was showing to my friends (who are all girls) my childhood photo.
You poked your nose inside..... right ?
(a) Yes (b) No
**********

5) I avoided to hold your hand during trekking. Couldn't you understand yet?
(a) Yes (b) No
**********

6) Should I not wait for my best friend (Anjali) at the bus stand?
(a)Yes (b) No
**********

7) Shouldn't I introduce you to my parents as a friend?
(a) Yes (b) No
**********

8) You have said you also like Lotus, cauliflower, banana's flower. Is it true ?
(a) Yes (b) No
**********

9) Oh was that your birthday. That's why I could see you in temple. I come daily to Temple. Do you know ?
(a) Yes (b) No

If you have answered "Yes" to any of the question, then I am not loving you. If you have answered "No", then you don't know the meaning of Love.
Hope everything is clear to you.

-ASHISH SHRIVASTAVA ( INDORE )

- LoveNismi ( Ansh Rav)

21 Simple Advices

ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.

THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.

FOUR. When you say, 'I love you,' mean it.

FIVE. When you say, 'I'm sorry,' look the person in the eye.

SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.

EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have dreams don't have much.

NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.

TEN. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.

TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.

THIRTEEN! When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, 'Why do you want to know?'

FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

FIFTEEN. Say 'bless you' when you hear someone sneeze.

SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and Responsibility for all your actions.
EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

TWENTY- ONE. Spend some time alone.

-ASHISH SHRIVASTAVA (INDORE )
- LoveNismi ( Ansh Rav)

kale hai to kya hua....

एक काला आदमी

बहुत ही काला

काला स्याह

सुपर काला

जैड ब्लैक

डबल अफ्रीकन एल्डर

सन ऑफ अमावस्य

औंधे तवे का ताऊ

पहाडी कौए का पडदादा
कोयल संप्रदाय का दादू

बंगाल का काला जादू

तारकोल जिसके पैरों में भक्ति भाव से पसरता हो,

कोयला जिसका रूप रंग पाने के लिये,

सदियों तक जमीन के नीचे बैठ कर तपस्या करता हो

जिसदिन उस कालानुभाव के दर्शन हुए,

जमीन थमी रह गयी अब इससे ज्यादा क्या कहुँ,

इतना कहने के बाद भी,

मेरे पास शब्दों की कमी रह गयी

शादी होते ही माँ-बाप को धक्के देकर बाहर निकाल देने वाली औलाद सा कपूत,

कुल मिला कर इतना काला जितनी किसी भ्रष्ट नेता की करतूत

एक दुकान पर गया

ना शर्म ना हया

बोला - फेयर एण्ड लवली है

दुकानदार ने कहा नहीं

तो कहने लगा -

फेयर-फेयर नैस जैसी कोई और क्रीम सही

दुकानदार बोला वो भी नहीं

तो बोला - कोई और

तो जब इस बार भी गर्दन दुकानदार ने इंकार में हिलाई

तो कहने लगा - Cherry Blossom ही दे दे

कम से कम चमक तो बनी रहेगी भाई..............

- LoveNismi ( Ansh Rav)

enjoy the latest edition......

HILLARIOUSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You will die laughing…..
Enjoy!!!
1)Tere Pyaar Mein Paagal Ho Gaya Peter ....
Waah! Waah!
Tere Pyaar Mein Paagal Ho Gaya Peter .... Waah! Waah!
Ab Hero Honda Splendor, 80 km Prati Litre .. !!
2)Bahaar Aane Se Pehle Fizaa Aa Gayii ....
Waah! Waah! Bahaar Aane Se Pehle Fizaa Aa Gayii ....
Waah! Waah!
Phool Ko Khilne Se Pehle Bakri Kha Gayii ... !!
3) Aatma Chhod Gayii Shareer Puraana .... Waah! Waah! Aatma Chhod Gayii Shareer Puraana ....
Waah! Waah!
Didi Tera Devar Deewana...!!
4) Saap Ne Piya Bakri Ka Khoon .... Waah! Waah!
Saap Ne Piya Bakri Ka Khoon .... Waah! Waah!
Good Afternoon! Good Afternoon! Good Afternoon!!
5) Yashomati Maiyya Se Bole Nandlala ....
Yashomati Maiyya Se Bole Nandlala ....
"Maa, Tata Sky Laga Daala To Life Jhingalala ..
6) Ek Ladka Tha ... Usey Kabhi Pyaar Nahi Hua Tha .... Uski Pant Ki Zip Hamesha Khuli Rehti Thi ....
Puchho Kyun ???
Pyaar Bina CHAIN Kahan Re ... !!!
7) Hoton Pe "Haan" Hai .... Dil Mein "Naa" Hain .... Hoton Pe "Haan" Hai .... Dil Mein "Naa" Hain ....
Shashi Kapoor Kehta Hai: "Mere Paas Maa Hai ...."
8) 2 Cockroach Gaana Gaa Rahe Thhe : "Aashiq Banaaya Aapne" ... Dono Marr Gaye ...
Because Gaana "HIT" Tha ....
9) Aapki Surat Mere Dil Mein Aise Bass Gayii Hai ...
Aapki Surat Mere Dil Mein Aise Bass Gayii Hai ...
Jaise Chhote Se Darwaaze Mein Bhais Phass Gayii Hai .. !!
10) Premika: "Aisa Khatt Likho Sajna, Ki Meri Umar Beet
Jaaye Padhne Mein ... " Premi: "$@# % #$ @ $ %#$ &&* !@#@ &&*( )(&% %#$% %#$%#$ !#@!# ?<>":::<< $%^$% %#%" @#@#!! ?>#$%^> $#$%&<<
#%$%""}}+ !@??>": @@#$$$?:@!! Le Padh !!!"
-

HOW TO START YOUR DAY WITH A POSITIVE ATTITUDE

1. Open a new file in your PC.

2. Name it "Boss"

3. Send it to the RECYCLE BIN

4. Empty the RECYCLE BIN

5. Your PC will ask you, "Are you sure you want to delete Boss permanently?"

6. Answer calmly, "Yes," and press the mouse button firmly....

7. Feel better?

HAVE A NICE DAY

- Ramu Garg

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

kasam le lo

Ek Pal Bhi Chain Se Guzra Ho Tu Kasam Le Lo

Siwae Yaado Ke Koi Sahara Ho To Kasam Le Lo...

Pehle To Baat Or Aur Thi Jo Tum Par Haq Jatate The

Ab Khud Par Bhi Koi Haq Hamara Ho To Kasam Le Lo...

Tum Ne Hi To Kaha Tha, Tumhare Labon Par Mera Hi Naam Aaye

Us Ke Baad Jo Liya Ho Naam Kisi Ka To Kasam Le Lo...

- Ramu Garg

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

how to look happy at work

As of today all personnel will be expected to look happy at work.

Rubber bands and paper clips will be provided at no cost .

Workload getting to you?

Feeling stressed?

Too many Priority 1 assignments?

Here is the new low cost way to cope with multiple Priority 1 assignments!

Take 2 paperclips and rubber bands.

Assemble them as shown on the picture.

Apply as shown in fig 3.

Enjoy your day.

This new office equipment will help you to reach the end of the day with a

smile on your face!

- Ramu Garg

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)