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Sunday, May 24, 2009

No matter

No matter how high the sky is,
How deep the ocean is,
How strong the wind is,
How wide the river is,

I just want to tell YOU….

*****************************************

Andhe ke hath me "TORCH",
Bahare ke hath me "RADIO",

Gunge ke hath me "MIKE",
AUR AAP KE HATH ME "MOBILE"

WAH WAH Kya Jamana Aaya hai!!!

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Aap itrate bahut ho
Dil ko behlate bahut ho

Sochte hai aap ko DINNER par le jaaye
Par kya kare ZALIM tum khate bahut ho.

*****************************************

Amiri ke khwab Dekhne laga,
Angreji Sharab Chakhane laga,

Baap ne kabhi Pager nahi dekha,
Aur beta Mobile rakhne laga!!!

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

Thursday, May 21, 2009

LIFE WITHOUT GIRLS

LIFE WITHOUT GIRLS:

The result

Markets silent

Streets empty

The police at rest

All mobile companies in loss

No SMS

No Flowers

No Valentine

No Candles

No Perfumes

All the men directed to Heaven.

Saturday, May 9, 2009

May I know the time please?

Young Man: Sir, may I know the time, please?

Old Man: Certainly not.

Young Man: Sir, but why? What are you going to loose,if you tell me the time?

Old Man: Yes, I may loose something if I tell you the time.

Young Man: But Sir, can you tell me how?

Old Man : See, if I tell you the time you will definitely thank me and may be tomorrow again you will ask me the time.

Young Man: Quite possible.

Old Man: May be we meet two three times more and you will ask my name and address.

Young Man: Quite possible.

Old Man: One day you may come to my house saying you were just passing by and came into wish me. Then as a courtsey, I will offer you a cup of tea. After my courteous approach you will try to come again. This time you will appreciate tea and ask who has made it.?

Young Man: Possible.

Old Man: made it Then I will tell you that my daughter has and I will then have to introduce my young and pretty daughter to you &; you will admire my daughter.

Young Man: Smiles. ;)

Old Man: Now onwards you will try to meet my daughter  again and again. You will offer her to go out for a movie together and a date with you.

Young Man: Smiles

Old Man: My daughter may start liking you and start waiting for you. After meeting regularly you will fall in love with her and propose her for marriage.

Young Man: Smiles

Old Man: One day both of you will come to me and tell me about your love and ask for my permission.

Young Man: Oh Yes! And smiles

Old Man: (Angrily) Young man, I will never marry my daughter to a person like you who does not even own a watch.

- Lovenismi (Ansh Rav)

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Applications Invited 4 GF

Due to recession, I sacked my Girlfriend (part of my cost cutting efforts) I need new one, so pass on this information to your female friends...please this is urgent (only females)

Applications are invited for the following post. The package and incentives are mentioned below:

Designation: Junior girl friend (trainee)

Experience: Must have ditched at least 2 guys (Fresher with excellent credentials will be considered)

Other requirement: Should have the Potential to do street bargaining and fight if required...

Age: 18-23 (if the individual is too good looking but not in the age group can also apply, special consideration will undertaken for them) Height, weight, complexions no bar, but is subjective.

Perks and incentives:

  • Total gross ( Monthly ) :
  • 2 gifts worth not exceeding Rs. 1000/-(no precious metals, stones)
  • bike rides each duration 1 hour
  • trips to National Highways
  • 5 Trips to Hanuman Mandir / Iskcon Temple
  • Kulfis / Chocobars at a regular gap of 3 days
  • Daily Provision of Samosa/Bread Pakoda/Bhel worth Rs. 10 /-
  • 2 movies per month (on weekends)
  • Visits to Shopping Malls and BARISTA every weekend (On your own expense)

A Pair of Jeans or T-shirts according to demand will be gifted, subject to finance availability and to the size available with the shopkeeper.

Net Deductions (Monthly): Affair Fund and un-professional taxes will be informed on joining the probation period is 6 months, after which confirmation (with Promotion to fulltime Girlfriend)

Please NOTE:

  1. Only females.
  2. Girls who left in the last 2 months need not apply.
  3. Ex-girlfriends will be eligible only if they agree to the above mentioned conditions.

There is more:

For girls who are not eligible, can take advantage of the referral program by referring their friends, colleagues etc.

Candle light or Tube light dinner will be given on every referral, even if candidate is not selected. Search never ends!!

Interested candidates can send their resume with Subject:

Name / fresher – exp / age.

Photo must be in attachment to the email address via mail

Note: Applications without photo will be rejected.

- Lovenismi (Ansh Rav)

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

10 Best Moments in Life

1. Giving the 1st month salary to your parents with care.

2. Thinking your love with tears.

3. Looking old photos & smiling.

4. Thinking your past school and college days.

5. A sweet & emotional chat with friends

6. Finding money in old dress when needed.

7. Holding hands with your loved ones for a walk.

8. Getting a hug from one who cares you.

9. 1st kiss to your child when he /she born.

10. The moments when your eyes are filled with tears after a big laugh.

Kissing Facts & Kiss Benefits

It is a matter of record that Canadian porcupines kiss one another on the lips.

01

The world's longest kiss took place on January 28, 2002. Louisa Almodovar and Rich Langly of New Jersey kissed for a record 30 hours, 59 minutes and 27 seconds on a segment of "Ricki Lake".

 02

Matrimonial pollsters' studies prove that a man who kisses his wife good-bye when he leaves for work every morning averages a higher income than does the fellow who doesn't do that thing.

03

In medieval Italy kisses weren't taken, or given, lightly.. If a man and a woman were seen embracing in public they could be forced to marry!

04

Our brains have special neurons that help us locate each others lips in the dark. 

(It's really true too! I've tried it!)

05

It is estimated that the average person will spend about 20,160 minutes kissing in their lifetime.

06

The first kiss ever shown in a movie was in 1896.

The movie, was called The Kiss.

07

Hershey's Kisses got their name because the machine that makes them looks like it's kissing the conveyor belt.

08

50% of all people kiss before they turn 14. Kissing helps reduce tooth decay.  Kissing increases the mouth's production of saliva, and saliva helps clean the mouth thus aides prevention of tooth decay.

09

- Lovenismi (Ansh Rav)

Monday, April 20, 2009

દિલથી ભારતવાસી

અમે યુ.એસ.એ. ના રહેવાસી પણ છીએ દિલથી ભારતવાસી

અમેરિકા તો વર્લ્ડ-ક્લાસ છે મનમાં એવો દમામ
ડોલર-સેંટમાં દીઠા સૌએ અડસઠ તીરથધામ

ન્યુ જર્સી કે મેનહટન વોશિંગટન બાલ્ટીમોર
વેસ્ટ કોસ્ટમાં હોલીવુડ ને ડીઝની કેરો શોર

સાંજ પડે ને સાંભરે અમને ડેડ-મોમ ને માસી
અમે યુ.એસ.એ. ના રહેવાસી પણ છીએ દિલથી ભારતવાસી

મોટલ વાળા પટેલ મગનભાઇ મેક થયા છે ભાઇ
નોખા રહેતા ઇંડિયન થઇ કહેવાયા એન.આર.આઇ

સ્વીચ ઉંધી નળ ઉંધા ચાલે ગાડી ઉંધે પાટે
ક્રિકેટ ગિલ્લી-દંડા છોડી બેઝબોલ માટે બાધે

ગોટ-પિટ ગોટપિટ કરતા જો મોટેલ પર બેઠા માસી
અમે યુ.એસ.એ. ના રહેવાસી પણ છીએ દિલથી ભારતવાસી


- Lovenismi (Ansh Rav)

સાઈન્ટીસ્ટસ on Swarg

બધા સાઈન્ટીસ્ટસ મરીને સ્વર્ગમાં ભેગા થાય છે…ઘણો સમય સાથે રહી કાંઈ કામ ન હોવાથી છેલ્લે તેઓ કંટાળીને થપ્પો રમવાનું વિચારે છે…

બદનસીબે આઈન્સ્ટાઈન નો દાવ હતો….એણે ૧….૨…..એમ ૧૦૦ ગણવાના હતા અને પછી બધાને શોધીને થપ્પો કરવાનો હતો…

ન્યુટન સિવાય બધા છુપાઈ ગયા. ન્યુટન ૧ મીટર ૧ મીટર નું ચોરસ દોરી તેમાં ઉભો રહી ગયો. એ પણ આઈન્સ્ટાઈન ની બાજુમાં જ…

આઈન્સ્ટાઈને ગણવાનું શરુ કર્યુ….૧,૨,૩,….૯૮,૯૯ અને ૧૦૦….આંખ ખોલી અને એણે જોયું તો ન્યુટન બાજુમાં જ ઊભો હતો…

આઈન્સ્ટાઈન બૂમ પાડી ને બોલ્યો….”અરે ન્યુટન નો થપ્પો, ન્યુટન નો થપ્પો…”

ન્યુટન મક્કમ મનોબળ અને અત્યંત દૃઢતાથી કહે છે …” હું આઊટ નથી કારણ કે હું ન્યુટન નથી….”

બધા ટાઈમ પ્લીઝ કરીને બહાર આવે છે…..અને ન્યુટન ને પૂછે છે શું થયુ??
ન્યુટન કહે છે ” હું એક સ્ક્વેર મીટર એરીયા માં ઉભો છું…જુઓ આ માર્ક કરેલ એરીયા…એટલે હું છું ન્યુટન પર સ્ક્વેર મીટર પણ ન્યુટન પર સ્ક્વેર મીટર એટલે પાસ્કલ………..એટલે હું નહીં પણ પાસ્કલ આઊટ છે

- Lovenismi (Ansh Rav)

આ માનવી...

આ માનવી કેવો નિષ્ઠુર છે
બોલે છે કાંઈ, વિચારે છે કાંઈ,
અને કરે છે કાંઈ
વિચારે છે કપટી છું કેટલો
કોણ જુએ છે હૃદય માંહી
આ માનવી...

સંબંધોમાં શોધે છે ફાયદા
ધંધામાં કરે છે વાયદા
અને રોજ નવા કરે છે તાયફા
આ માનવી...

પૈસાથી તોલે છે સંબંધોને
ખોટ જાય તો તોડે છે સંબંધોને
સંબંધોનો વેપાર કરી લીધો
આ માનવી...

ચહેરા પર ખંધુ સ્મિત
અને હૃદયમાંહી શકુનિ ઝરતો
લાલચ અને કપટને સાથ રાખતો
ઈશ્ર્વરને બદનામ કરી દીધો
આ માનવી...

- Loveable Poet

Friday, April 10, 2009

Love Marriage VS Arranged Marriage - The IT Perspective

Love Marriage: Resembles procedural programming language. We have some set functions like flirting, going to movies together, making long conversations on phone and then try to fit all functions to the candidate we like.

Arranged Marriage: Similar to object oriented programming approach. We first fix the candidate and then try to implement functions on her. The main object is fixed and various functions are added to supplement the main program. The functions can be added or deleted.

Love Marriage: It is a throwaway type of prototype as client requirements rises with time thus it is a dynamic system and difficult to maintain.

Arranged Marriage: Requirements are well defined so use of waterfall model is possible.

Love Marriage: Family system hangs because hardware called parents are not responding.

Arranged Marriage: Compatible with hardware Parents.

Love Marriage: You are the project leader so u are responsible for implementation and execution of PROJECT- married life.

Arranged Marriage: You are a team member under project leader parents so they are responsible for successful execution of project Married life.

Love Marriage: Client expectations include exciting feature as spouse cooking food, washing clothes etc.

Arranged Marriage: All these features are covered in the SRS as required features.

Love Marriage: Acceptance test possible you can try before you Buy.

Arranged Marriage: Product is sold on an as is where is basis, Product once sold will not be taken back!

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Marriage Jokes repeat

CASE 1

Getting married is like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.

CASE 2

At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger??" The other replied, "Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."

CASE 3

Before a man is married, he is incomplete. Then when he is married, he is finished.

CASE 4

Marriage is an institution in which a man losses his bachelor's degree and the woman gets her master's status.

CASE 5

A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married??" And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm

still paying for it."

CASE 6

Young son : "Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"

Dad : "That happens in most countries son."

CASE 7

Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and then it was too late."

CASE 8

A happy marriage is a matter of give and take; the husband gives and the wife takes

CASE 9

When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a ten-year married man looks happy, we wonder why. Affair ?

CASE 10

In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.

CASE 11

After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." And the Husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice it."

CASE 12

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classified : "Wife wanted". The next day, he received hundreds letters. They all said the same thing "You can have mine."

CASE 13

When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing : either the car is new or his wife is new.

CASE 14

A woman was telling her friend : "It is I who made my husband a millionaire."

And what was he before you married him?" the friend asked. The woman replied, "A Billionaire."

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

Jokes

An old rich man marries a young gal.

Interviewer asks the girl: Apne inmein shaadi ke liye kya dekha?

Girl: Ek to inki income aur doosre inke din kum.

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PRINCIPAL :Agar koi ladka girls hostel mein gaya toh first time 100 Rs fine, 2nd time 200 Rs. Fine and 3rd time 500.

MUNNA BHAI :Boley to Monthly paas ka kya lega Mamu?


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TUSI bade hi gr8 ho,
RASGULLE ki pl8 ho,
PEPSI ka cr8 ho,
ANDE ka oml8 ho,
SMS KARANE ME bade le8 ho,
JALEBI ki tarah stra8 ho,
KHER jo bhi ho mere fevr8 ho...!

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Boy : Janeman! Tute huye dil se pyaar karogi ya dil tutne tak pyaar karogi.

Girl : Harmkhor! Tuti huyi chappal se pitega ya chappal tutne tak pitega.

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

Monday, March 30, 2009

प्यार का PC

अभी अभी तो प्यार का PC किया है चालु

अपने दिल के Hard Disk पे और कितनी Files डालु

   

अपने चेहरे से रूसवाई की Error तो हटाओ

ऐ जानेमन अपने दिल का Password तो बताओ

   

वो तो हम है जो आप की चाहत दिल मॆं रखते है

वरना आप जैसे कितने Softwares तो बाज़ार में बिकते है

   

रोज़ रात आप मेरे सपने में आते हो

मेरे प्यार को Mouse बना के उंगलियों पे नचाते हो

   

तेरे प्यार का Email मेरे दिल को लुभाता है

पर बीच में तेरे बाप का Virus आ जाता है

   

और करवाओगे हमसे कितना इन्तजार

हमारे दिल की साईट पे कभी Enter तो मारो यार

   

अपने इन्सल्ट का बदला देखो कैसे लुंगा

जानेमन तेरे बाप को Ctrl+Alt+Delete कर दुंगा

   

आपके कई नखरे अपने दिल पे बैंग हो गये

दो PC जुड़ते जुड़ते Hang हो गये

   

आप जैसो के लिये दिल को Cut किया करते है

वरना बाकी केसेस में तो Copy Paste किया करते हैं

   

आपक हँसना आप क चलना आप की वो स्टाईल

आपकी अदाओं की हमने Save कर ली है File

   

जो सदीयों से होता आया है वो रीपीट कर दुंगा

तु ना मिली तो तुझे Ctrl+Alt+Delete कर दुंगा

   

लड़कीयां सुन्दर हैं और लोनली हैं

प्रोब्लम है कि बस वो Read Only हैं

   

- Kadia (Orkut)

- Loveable Poet

Friday, March 27, 2009

Jokes to Make You Laugh

BOY : May I hold your hand?
GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.

GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
BOY : You love me...

GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??

GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple

GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??

BOY : I love you and I could die for you!
GIRL : How soon??

BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!
GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??

SHARON : Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning
Kiss??
TRACY : I did once. He'd forgotten to take the
Cigarette out of his mouth.

MAN : You remind me of the sea.
WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
MAN : NO, because you make me sick.

WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear
And comes out of the other.
HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both
Ears and comes out of the mouth.

MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andrew says I'm ugly.What
Do u think,
Peter?
PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly.

1) Girlfriend : "...And are you sure you love me and
No one else ?"
Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again
Yesterday".

2) Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun Or the moon?"
Pupil : "The moon".
Teacher : "Why?"

Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need It but the sun gives us light only in the day time When we don't need it".

3) Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on Talking when people are no longer interested?"

Pupil : "A teacher".

4) Waiter : "Would you like your coffee black?"
Customer : "What other colors do you have?"

5) My father is so old that when he was in school,
History was called current affairs.

6) Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !"
Sam : "It's a family tradition".
Teacher : "What do you mean?"
Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father
Is a teacher".
Teacher : "What about your mother?"
Sam : "She's a woman".

7) Tom : "How should I convey the news to my father
That I've failed?"
David: "You just send a telegram: Result declared,
Past year's performance repeated".

8) Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a
Donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be Showing?"
Student : "Brotherly love".
9) Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say
Prayers before eating?"
Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good
Cook".

10) Patient : "What are the chances of my recovering
Doctor?"
Doctor : "One hundred percent. Medical records show That nine out of ten people die of the disease you Have. Yours is the tenth case I've treated. The others All died".

11) Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married On the same day and at the same time."

12) Teacher : " George Washington not only chopped
Down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it.
Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?"
One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is
hand.

 

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Shree Lord Ganesha

Lord Ganesh

 

The Lord Ganesha

Definition of friendship

*The definition of Friendship*

      What is a true friend? Often, I have struggled to understand what makes one person there, truly, more than the next. We all go through life with different people by our sides at different times in our lives. But some people distinguish themselves. They are true friends.

There are times in all of our lives when we need the comfort and solace of someone who understands completely, and for some reason, continues to help us when we are at our worst, perhaps even exhausting them.

          Going through a time of crisis reveals that your real friends are. It's not to say that those who are not there for you in these bad times are not good people or good friends. But you get to see their true dedication and moral character when you face adversity.

          But your real, true, friends are the ones who come through with flying colors, when you do not even have to ask. There is something magical about the bonds of true friendship. Though you may not have many kinds of these people in your life, be thankful for the ones who are there. The people in our lives are a blessing.

          When going through rough times, don't expect everyone to understand—you will just be let down more if they do not. Reach out to your friends if you want them to understand, and give them the opportunity to help. (They aren't mind readers!)

         If you do not find someone to understand, you know that the person has not defined themselves in your eyes as the kind of person who will be there through thick and thin.

          You can still value people in your life who are not "till the end" friends. These people have just as much to offer, and it should be said that each person in your life is there for a reason. If a friend just does not get the idea that you need him or her, try and understand what that person is going through, or how they view the relationship.

            Don't be afraid to confront your friend to see if everything is okay. And most of all, don't expect everyone to run to your aid. Everyone is busy with his or her own lives. Rest assured, however, you will find a friend who will be there for you, and you will never truly be alone. Open your eyes to the people in your life and look for someone who you can depend on.

         Most of all return the favor! When someone goes out on the live for you. You should do the same. Thank friends who have helped you through rough times and let them know how much you appreciate all they have done and who they are!

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

20 Golden Rules for any Office

Rule 1
The Boss is always right.

Rule 2
If the Boss is wrong, see rule 1.

Rule 3
Those who work get more work.
Others get pay, perks, and promotions.

Rule 4
Ph.D. stands for "Pull Him Down".
The more intelligent a person,
the more hardworking a person,
the more committed a person;
the more number of persons are engaged in pulling that person down.

Rule 5
If you are good, you will get all the work.
If you are really good, you will get out of it.

Rule 6
When the Bosses talk about improving productivity,
they are never talking about themselves.

Rule 7
It doesn't matter what you do,
it only matters what you say you've done and what you are going to do.

Rule 8
A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the butt.

Rule 9
Don't be irreplaceable.
If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

Rule 10
The more crap you put up with,
the more crap you are going to get.

Rule 11
If at first you don't succeed, try again.
Then quit.
No use being a damn fool about it.

Rule 12
When you don't know what to do,
walk fast and look worried.

Rule 13
Following the rules will not get the job done.

Rule 14
If it weren't for the last minute,
nothing would get done.

Rule 15
Everything can be filed under
"Miscellaneous".

Rule 16
No matter how much you do,
you never do enough.

Rule 17
You can do any amount of work
provided it isn't the work you are supposed to be doing.

Rule 18
In order to get a promotion,
you need not necessarily know your job.

Rule 19
In order to get a promotion,
you only need to pretend that you know your job.

Rule 20
The last person that quit or was fired
will be held responsible for everything that goes wrong.

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....

You have to think before you speak to me!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....

my presence ever makes you feel uncomfortable!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....

you have to thank me for everything i do for you!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....

you have to say sorry for everything

that you don't do!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....

you have to ask me for favors!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....

you think i would not be curious to

know your new philosophy of life!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....

you go by what i say and do not understand

what i don't say!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....

you think that listening to your dreams

would put me to sleep!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....

you think that seeing you in pain, would

not bring a tear to me!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....

you think I do not remember the first time

we met!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....

you don't see the thousand ways I try to

make you happy!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....

you don't realize how your smile brightens

up my day!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....

you would rather keep quiet when you really

wanna talk!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....

you hesitate to ask me to stay back when

you think we should be together!

I AM NOT YOUR FRIEND IF.....

you take too much time to tell me what i

mean to you!

Am I Your FRIEND ????

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

Questions Of Life

How many steps will it take to walk a mile?
How many seconds will it take to wait a while?
How many battles do we need for us to win?
How many Gods do we need to forgive our sins?

How many times must a man betray his faith?
How many times can a man control his hate?
When do we say that justice isn't fair??
How can we endure the burden that we bear?

Where is the youth who will dare?
Where can we find the people who really care?
Where can we find the road to success?
Is it in the north, south, east, or west?

Where can I find true love?
That God had gave from above?
How many struggles do we need to make it through?
When do we say that a statement is false or true?

How can I forgive others?
When they killed my peers?
Can you give help to those people in need?
After they have dropped you and you bleed?

Who are the people you can trust?
In this world, to fight is a must.
The world will continue to evolve,
Until those questions have been solved.

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

Friendship Flowing

A friend who you can call anytime,

whom you can irritate all day and night.

One who listens to your endless talks,

and who is only yours even after a fight.

A friend who smiles when you are happy,

a friend who shed tears before you cry.

Someone whose always there to help you out,

who holds you when you have lost your courage to try.

The one, you, reveal all your secrets to,

whom you look upto when you are low.

Who'll hold the brigde to save you from a fall,

as friendship is a relation with the smoothest flow.

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

Still I will not accept defeat

I am lost in unsure thoughts,

Mind is divided in thousand slots.

Alone I stand on the struggling street,

Still I will not accept defeat.

 

Relations are selfish, truth is hidden,

Past is confused, future uncertain.

Dreams fade away before being concrete,

Still I will not accept defeat.

 

Fear is stable, tears come often,

Happiness is costly, smiles forbidden.

Untold thoughts are crushed beneath the feet,

Still I will not accept defeat.

 

Hatred is prominent, love is lost,

Money is made at morality's cost.

Life may end struggling..ruthlessly luck may treat,

Still I will not accept defeat.

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

jokes more

Teacher :What happened in 1869?

Student:Gandhi ji was born.

Teacher :What happened in 1873?

Student:Gandhiji was four years old.!

------------------------------------------------------- 

Question:What is the fullform of MATHS. ?

Anwser: Mentaly Affected Teachers Harrasing Students

-------------------------------------------------------Teacher :Because of Gandhiji's hard work what do we get on 15th August.

Student:A holiday

-------------------------------------------------------Teacher :Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun.Everyone must attend it.

Raju:No ma'm! I will not be able to attend it.

Teacher :Why?

Raju:My mother will not allow me to go so far!!!

------------------------------------------------------- 

Teacher: How old is ur father.
Sunny:As old as I am.
Teacher:How is it possible?
Sunny:He became father only after I was born.

------------------------------------------------------- 

Teacher: (1)There is a frog, (2)Ship is sinking, (3)potatoes cost Rs 3/kg.
Then, what is my age?
STUDENT:32 yrs.
Teacher:How do you know?
STUDENT:Well,my sister is 16 yrs old and she is half mad.

------------------------------------------------------- 

Teacher: Where does God live?
Little boy: I think he lives in our bathroom.
Teacher: Why do you say that?
Little boy: Well, every morning my daddy bangs on the door and says, 'God, are you still in there?'
------------------------------------------------------- 
Teacher:"What is your name?".
Student:"Mera naam Suraj Prakash hai."
Teacher:"When I ask aquestion in english,answer it in english."
Student:"My name is Sunlight.

- LoveNIsmi (Ansh Rav)

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

44 NETWORK MARKETING DOs and DON'Ts

1) Start with written goals and plans!

2) Don't wait for everything to be exactly right to start. IT NEVER WILL! Start now, with whatever you have. The things you need will come to you as you work towards your goal.

3) Realize that "rejection" is natural. For every 20 people you contact, expect 19 "no's" for every "yes." You may very well do better than that, but expect 19 rejections. This way, the rejections won't bother you because you expect them. Also, realize that they're not rejecting YOU - they're simply rejecting an idea. Just keep moving ahead. Be persistent, ignore the rejections, and you'll get more than enough "yes's" to build a highly successful business. Always remember: Some will. Some won't. So what? Someone's waiting. Next!

4) Treat your network marketing business as a serious, full-time business, and it will become one.

5) Follow-ups are just as important as the initial contact. If a person hasn't joined yet, following up with more exciting information can turn the tide. Many people report that they get their best people after following up 3-5 times.

6) Be patient. You'll work the hardest your first six months and get compensated the least. Big incomes never happen overnight in network marketing. They only come after you've properly shown your personally-sponsored d people how to duplicate your efforts. Network Marketing is a numbers game.

7) Don't give your Distributors unrealistic expectations.

8) Be willing to invest more money into your business than you get out of it in the beginning.

9) Don't quit. The only way to fail is if you give up.

10) Contact your up line and get their help and suggestions on how to grow your business. They will expect you to listen and then TAKE ACTION based exactly upon the advice they give.

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Why student fails in exam?

Dear friends,

Read this and Enjoy..!!

Why student fails in exam?

It's not the fault of the student if he/she fails, because the year has an ONLY 365 days.

Typical academic year for a student.

Sundays 52, Sundays in a year, which are rest days. Balance 313 days.

Summer holidays 50 where weather is very hot and difficult to study.

Balance 263 days.

8 hours daily sleep means 122 days. Balance 141 days.

1 hour for daily playing (good for health) means 15 days.

Balance 126 days.

Two hours daily 1 for food & other delicacies (chew properly & eat) means 30 days.

Balance 96 days.

1 hour for talking (man is a social animal) means 15 days.

Balance 81 days.

Exam days per year at least 35 days. Balance 46 days.

Quarterly, Half yearly and festival holidays) 40 days.

Balance 6 days.

For sickness at least 3 days. Balance 3 days.

Movies and functions at least 2 days. Balance 1 day.

That 1 day is your Birthday.

How can a student pass?

- LoveNIsmi ( Ansh Rav)

- RAJIL'S..!!

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Meri Mehbooba Hai Tu

Meri Mehbooba Hai Tu

Khusbhoo Ka Jhoka Hai Tu

Tu Har Pal Mere Khayalon Mein Hai

Meri Mehbooba Hai Tu

Khusbhoo Ka Jhoka Hai Tu

Tu Har Pal Mere Khayalon Mein Hai

Bina Tum Ko Dekha Tumhari Kasam

Meri Saans Chalti Nahin

Mere Dil Pe Chaya Nasha

Haan Tere Pyaar Ka

Tere Pyaar Ka

Meri Mehbooba Hai Tu

Khusbhoo Ka Jhoka Hai Tu

Tu Har Pal Mere Khayalon Mein Hai

 

Aayi Zameen Pe Tu Mere Liye

Tu Aasmaan Ki Pari

Tanha Akele Teri Yaad Mein

Main Likhta Raha Shaayri

Palke Uthake Na Jhukao

Mauka Yahin To Hai Deedar Ka

Tere Pyaar Ka

Meri Mehbooba Hai Tu

Khusbhoo Ka Jhoka Hai Tu

Tu Har Pal Mere Khayalon Mein Hai

 

Chehre Se Teri Jhalakti Haya

Tujh Mein Shararat Bhi Hai

Aankhon Mein Teri Jo Takrara Hai

To Dil Mein Mohabbat Bhi Hai

Tujh Mein Wafa Hai

Saadgee Hai

Rang Juda Hai Mere Yaar Ka

Tere Pyaar Ka

Meri Mehbooba Hai Tu

Khusbhoo Ka Jhoka Hai Tu

Tu Har Pal Mere Khayalon Mein Hai

Bina Tum Ko Dekha Tumhari Kasam

Meri Saans Chalti Nahin

Mere Dil Pe Chaya Nasha

Haan Tere Pyaar Ka

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

- Abhihjeet, ,Kumar Sanu - Lyrics

kya muhaabat kaabil nahi

kya muhabbat kisi ke bhi kaabil nahi hai

jab bhi dil jo chahe use haasil nahi hai

rishton ko jodne me lag gayi zindagi

par zindagi me koi bhi shaamil nahi hai

zara si der apne pyar ko dulaar loon

kya "maan" iske bhi kaabil nahi hai

katl kar diya usne meri har tamanna ko

daava kar raha hai wo ki kaatil nahi hai

chala aaya wo meri mazaar ki dehleej pe

meri kabra ka diya ab bhi bojhil nahi hai

LoveNIsmi

mere pehlu me aakar wo roya zaar zaar

uske ashq na ponche maan itna bedil nahi hai

saans ab jeevan ko itni door tak le aayi hain

maut kah rahi hai wo teri manzil nahi hai

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

Thursday, March 5, 2009

when u Love.someone

When you love someone so deep inside,
It seems like it's so easy to hide.
You've loved her for so very long,
You would think she could do no wrong.

Every day you would hope and pray,
That she would always stay this way.
She treated you like you should be treated,
You thought your life was finally completed.

You thought your love was growing true,
And then one day it was all so blue.
She started putting you down and it hurt,
You thought all you were to her was dirt.

She started ignoring you and you wondered why,
All you wanted to do was curl up and die.
You thought your relationship would never end,
But that was all so fake and pretend.
One day She was so sweet to you,
You thought all those things were maybe untrue,
Two days later she was back the same,
You thought you were the one to blame.
She thought the relationship was getting too serious
And that you had become a little too curious.
By this time you knew it wouldn't last,
All the nice things She said were in the past.

You thought that you would marry her some day,
But this time God wanted to get her way.
You wanted things back how they were before,
But you knew this couldn't happen anymore.
It was a Wednesday morning about 3 o'clock,

You heard the news and it wasn't a shock.
You knew this was going to happen soon,
As you laid there and cried in the pale lit moon.

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

I never felt a love

I never felt a love...Pls

I never felt a love

Like this before

It's a love like no other

Something I have always hoped for

A love with friendship

Humor and heart

A bond so strong

It would never part

A love that makes you smile

From ear to ear

A love that is joyful

Without any fear

A love that is beautiful

From the inside out

A love with no tears,

Pain, or doubt

A love with soul

So tender and true

A love that I have found

Only in you…

(¨`·.·´¨)
`·.¸(¨`·.·´¨)
(¨`·.·´¨)¸.·´
`·.¸.·´


LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

Maa Baap Ka Saaya

Wah haanth jo ponchhte then aansun mere
Mit jaate then gham,jinke duwaon ke asar se
Dhundhte hain o kaandhe,roti thin aankh jin par
MAA-BAAP ka saaya jab uth jata hai sar se

Ungli pakad kar chalna,hajaar khwahishen karna
Gujarti thi unki zindagi,hamare hi dagar se
Yaad aati hai o baaten,dil rota hai AAH aksar
MAA-BAAP ka saaya jab uth jata hai sar se

Wah ruthna hamara,Wah aansunwen bahana
Puri hoti thi khwahishe,humare is asar se
Baagh aate hain yaad,chubhte hain kaante aksar
MAA-BAAP ka saaya jab uth jata hai sar se

Dil todna na unka na taklif kabhi dena
Nikaalna hai tumhen hi unhen ashkon ke sahar se
Yatimo ko deho unhen ja kar samjho,kya hota hai tab
MAA-BAAP ka saaya jab uth jata hai sar se

Wah dhundhli si aankhen Wag maasum sa chehra
Yatimo ko dekho ge jab tum unki najar se
Samajh jaoge AAH tum bhi, kya hota hai tab
MAA-BAAP ka saaya jab uth jata hai sar se

EHSAS-E-ILTEJA hai , ek baat meri maano
Apna aasiyana banana,unki muhabbaton ki asar se
Bahut taklif hoti hai ,hota hai KAASH hontho pe aksar
MAA-BAAP ka saaya jab uth jata hai sar se


LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

Sixty Uses of Salt ?

Although you may not realize it, simple table salt has a great number of uses other than simply seasoning your food. The following list will give you sixty uses of salt, many of which you probably didn't realize:
1. Soak stained hankies in salt water before washing.
2. Sprinkle salt on your shelves to keep ants away.
3. Soak fish in salt water before descaling; the scales will come off easier.
4. Put a few grains of rice in your salt shaker for easier pouring.
5. Add salt to green salads to prevent wilting.
6. Test the freshness of eggs in a cup of salt water; fresh eggs sink; bad ones float.
7. Add a little salt to your boiling water when cooking eggs; a cracked egg will stay in its shell this way.
8. A tiny pinch of salt with egg whites makes them beat up fluffier.
9. Soak wrinkled apples in a mildly salted water solution to perk them up.
10. Rub salt on your pancake griddle and your flapjacks won't stick.
11. Soak toothbrushes in salt water before you first use them; they will last longer.
12. Use salt to clean your discolored coffee pot.
13. Mix salt with turpentine to whiten you bathtub and toilet bowl.
14. Soak your nuts in salt brine overnight and they will crack out of their shells whole. Just tap the end of the shell with a hammer to break it open easily.
15. Boil clothespins in salt water before using them and they will last longer.
16. Clean brass, copper and pewter with paste made of salt and vinegar, thickened with flour
17. Add a little salt to the water your cut flowers will stand in for a longer life.
18. Pour a mound of salt on an ink spot on your carpet; let the salt soak up the stain.
19. Clean your iron by rubbing some salt on the damp cloth on the ironing surface.
20. Adding a little salt to the water when cooking foods in a double boiler will make the food cook faster.
21. Use a mixture of salt and lemon juice to clean piano keys.
22. To fill plaster holes in your walls, use equal parts of alt and starch, with just enough water to make stiff putty.
23. Rinse a sore eye with a little salt water.
24. Mildly salted water makes an effective mouthwash. Use it hot for a sore throat gargle.
25. Dry salt sprinkled on your toothbrush makes a good tooth polisher.
26. Use salt for killing weeds in your lawn.
27. Eliminate excess suds with a sprinkle of salt.
28. A dash of salt in warm milk makes a more relaxing beverage.
29. Before using new glasses, soak them in warm salty water for awhile.
30. A dash of salt enhances the taste of tea.
31. Salt improves the taste of cooking apples.
32. Soak your clothes line in salt water to prevent your clothes from freezing to the line; likewise, use salt in our final rinse to prevent the clothes from freezing.
33. Rub any wicker furniture you may have with salt water to prevent yellowing.
34. Freshen sponges by soaking them in salt water.
35. Add raw potatoes to stews and soups that are too salty.
36. Soak enamel pans in salt water overnight and boil salt water in the next day to remove burned-on stains.
37. Clean your greens in salt water for easier removal of dirt.
38. Gelatin sets more quickly when a dash of salt is added.
39. Fruits put in mildly salted water after peeling will not discolor.
40. Fabric colors hold fast in salty water wash.
41. Milk stays fresh longer when a little salt is added.
42. Use equal parts of salt and soda for brushing your teeth.
43. Sprinkle salt in your oven before scrubbing clean.
44. Soaked discolored glass in a salt and vinegar solution to remove stains...
45. Clean greasy pans with a paper towel and salt.
46. Salty water boils faster when cooking eggs.
47. Add a pinch of salt to whipping cream to make it whip more quickly.
48. Sprinkle salt in milk-scorched pans to remove odor.
49. A dash of salt improves the taste of coffee.
50. Boil mismatched hose in salty water and they will come out matched.
51. Salt and soda will sweeten the odor of your refrigerator.
52. Cover wine-stained fabric with salt; rinse in cool water later.
53. Remove offensive odors from stove with salt and cinnamon.
54. A pinch of salt improves the flavor of cocoa.
55. To remove grease stains in clothing, mix one part salt to four parts alcohol.
56. Salt and lemon juice removes mildew.
57. Sprinkle salt between sidewalk bricks where you don't want grass growing.
58. Polish your old kerosene lamp with salt for a better look.
59. Remove odors from sink drainpipes with a strong, hot solution of salt water.
60. If a pie bubbles over in your oven, put a handful of salt on top of the spilled juice. The mess won't smell and will bake into a dry, light crust which will wipe off easily when the oven has cooled

i miss you

Though miles come between us,
And distance keeps us apart,
Nothing can ever change
The love inside my heart….
I may not be there with you,
Every minute of the day,
But you're always here with me,
In at least a thousand ways,
Whether it be a thought,
Or a moment that we've shared,
It only takes a second
To get from here to there….
Though I cannot really feel you
here at my side,
it’s always nice to know
I've got these memories in my mind.
I Miss YouLoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Love is Everything

Lisa loved basketball
Friends and parties too
And when it came to painting
That's all she wanted to do
She painted everything she saw
Birds, flowers, and the sky
Some days she sat at her window
And painted everything that passed her by
But lately she'd been feeling woozy
Her muscles ached a lot
And her parents got kind of worried
So they took her to the doc
The doctor took a couple of tests
To see if everything was okay
Then the nurse came out with a look of sadness
And this is what she had to say;
"I'm sorry but you've got leukemia,"
"You've got about 3 months more."
Then Lisa got up and ran out of the room
And slammed the office door
She ran down the street screaming
And cried her eyes out dry
and stayed up all night
Wondering what it's like to die
Her parents held her tightly
And said, "We love you,"
"We'll make your last few months the greatest,"
"We'll do anything for you."
So Lisa and her parents moved to Florida
To live by the sea
Because Lisa loved the ocean
And when she dies, that's where she wanted to be
She spent her days painting
And horseback riding in by the bay
But one day she met this guy
And his name was Jay
They collected seashells together
And talked about all kinds of things
And then one day while walking
He handed her a ring It said, "I love you,"
Which brought tears to Lisa’s eyes?
And when he put it on her finger
She began to cry
He asked her what was wrong, and she replied,
"I've got leukemia, and about a month more."
He said," No matter what, I love you,"
"And no matter what, you are the one I adore."
So they spent every day together
And swam in the Atlantic all day
But Lisa was getting weaker
And it was hard for her stay awake
So one day Lisa painted her picture
And gave it to Jay She said,
"I want you to remember me,"
"Even when I leave this place."
But one day while they were walking
And searching for seashells in the sand
Lisa collapsed and started to lose her breath
And said to Jay, "Please hold my hand."
"I love you more than anyone,"
You are my only true love,"
"But now my time is up,"
"And I'll watch over you from above,"
Then Lisa's body was lifeless
As she lay in Jay's arms
And he sat there all day
And kept her safe from harm!

Jab bhi qareeb aati hoon batanay ke liye..

Jab bhi qareeb aati hoon batanay ke liye
Zindagi door rakhti hai satanay ke liye

Mehfilon ki shaan na samajhna mujhay
Main to hansti hoon gham chupanay ke liye

In faaslon ko na samjho meri be-Wafayi
Main door hoon tumse, paas aanay ke liye

jano haqeeqat mere in Aansuon ko
Main to rooti hoon tumhein rulanay ke liye

Koi gila nahi hai mujhay apni barbadi ka
Main to khaili thi aag se jal janay ke liye

Ab duniya kuch bhi kahay, mujhay parwa nahi
Main to jeeti thi zindagi, mar janay k liye
- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

अगर रख सको तो 1 निशानी हु मैं

अगर रख सको तो 1 निशानी हु मैं,
और खो दो तो सिर्फ 1 कहानी हू मैं,
रोक पाए ना जिसको ये सारी दुनिया,
वो 1 बूंद आंख का पानी हू मैं.............!!!!

सबको प्यार देने की आदत है मुझे,
अपनी अलग पहचान बनाने की आदत है मुझे ,
कितना भी गहरा जख्म दे कोई ,
उतना ही ज्यादा मुस्कुराने की आदत है मुझे .....!!!!

इस अजनबी दुनिया में , अकेला एक खवाब हू ,
सवालों से खफा , छोटा सा जवाब हू ,
जो ना समझ सके , उनके लिए " कौन " ,
जो समझ चुके , उनके लिए किताब हू मैं ,

दुनिया की नज़र में , जाने क्यों चुभा सा ,
सबसे नशीला और बदनाम शराब हू मैं ,
सर उठाकर देखो , वो देख रहा है तुमको ,
जिसको ना देखा उसने , वो चमकता आफ़ताब हू मैं ,

आँख से देखोगे , तो ख़ुशी पाओगे ,
दिल से पूछोगे , तो दर्द का सैलाब हू मैं

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

FRIEND Mean afterall

Yaden rukti nahi rok pane se,
dil rukta nahi kisi ke samjhane se.
Ruk jati hai dhadkan tumhe bhul jane se,
hum tumhe yaad karte hai jeene ke bahane se...

"HUM PHUL KI TARAH HASNA JANTE HAIN HUM HANS KAR GUM CHHUPAANA JAANTE HAIN LOG

ILKAR RISHTE NIBHATE HAIN TO KYA HUA HUM BINA MILE RISHTE NIBHANA JAANTE HAIN ..."

I Love you not because of what you are ?
But, i Love you because of what i am when i am with you..
I love you not only for you have made of yourself,
But for what you are making of me…
I love you as you have done more,
that any could have done to make me good,
And more than any late coould have done to make me happy.
You have done it by being yourself,
Purheps that’s what being a
“FRIEND” Mean afterall

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

BUL GAYI KYA

Mahabbat Tum Nahi Kerna
Mahabbat Main Nahi Kerta
K Dil Ko Thais Lagti Hai
Kabhi Jaan bhi Pighalti Hai

Ishara Ho Nahi Sakta
Aur Guzara Ho Nahi Sakta

Mahabbat Ko Jitaane Se
Mahabbat Haar Jati Hai

Kam-sini Ki Nadaani
Kam-sini Mein Achhi Hai

Kabhi Bhi Chot Sehne Ki
Khahish Tum Nahi Kerna

Mahabbat Main Nahi Kerta
Mahabbat Tum nahi Kerna
- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

FRIENDSHIP

FRIENDSHIP Mean Beauty Of A Human
FRIENDSHIP Mean Like Gold’s
FRIENDSHIP Mean Fresh Flower
FRIENDSHIP Mean Feeling
FRIENDSHIP Mean Happiness
FRIENDSHIP Mean Pleased
FRIENDSHIP Mean Sharing
FRIENDSHIP Mean Thinking
FRIENDSHIP Mean Suggestion
FRIENDSHIP Mean Connection
FRIENDSHIP Mean Wasting Time
FRIENDSHIP Mean Killer Of Life
FRIENDSHIP Mean Teasing
FRIENDSHIP Mean Joking
FRIENDSHIP Mean Good Relationship
FRIENDSHIP Mean Good Partner
FRIENDSHIP Mean Calling In A Savior Condition
FRIENDSHIP Mean Leaving In A Savior Condition
FRIENDSHIP Mean Living In A Good Condition
FRIENDSHIP Mean Time Pass
FRIENDSHIP Mean Investigate
FRIENDSHIP Means A Part Of Life
FRIENDSHIP Means A Nice Thing
FRIENDSHIP Means A River
FRIENDSHIP Mean Winds
FRIENDSHIP Mean Very Sensitive Relation
FRIENDSHIP Mean Trees Of Food
FRIENDSHIP Mean Taste Than Sugarversation
- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

School Vs Hindi Film

School ------- Yaadein
Pricipal ------ Jaani Dushman
Classes ------- Kabhi Kabhi
Canteen------- Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna
Home Work -------- Godzilla
Exams -------- Kalyug
Examination Hall---- Chamber Of Secret
Exam-Time ---------- Qayamat Se Qayamt Tak
Question Paper --------- Paheli
Answer Paper ---------- Kora Kagaz
Cheating ---------- Aksar/Chupke Chupke
Paper Out ---------- Plan
Examiner ------------- The Killer
Last Exam ----------- Independence Day
aper Correction --------- Andha Kanoon
Marks ----------- Assambhav
Result ----------- Murder
Pass ------------ Ajjoba/ Chamatkar
Fail ----------- Devdas
Supplementary ------- Aakhri Raas
- Lovenismi (Ansh Rav)

Computer Vs. Hindi Films

Pentium III & Pentium I - Bade miyan and Chhote miyan.
Computer infected by Virus - Pyar to Hona hitha.
Hard disk and Floppy disk - Gharwaali Baharwaali.
F1 - Guide.
Esc - Nau Do Gyarah.
Ctrl+Alt+Del - AkhriRastaa.
CrtlC + CtrlV - Duplicate.
Undo - Aa ab lautchale.
Super User Password - Gupt.
BackUp - Jaagteraho.
UPS - Janta Hawaldar.
Server -Godfather.
Proxy Server - Padosan.
Security -Nakabandi.
Storage - Tehkhana.
Storage capacity -Badhti ka naam Dadhi.
Computer without RAM - KoraKagaz.
Computer whose OS is DOS - Buddha mil gaya.
System which frequently requires bootable disk - Sharabi.
DumbTerminal - Anari.
Mouse - Jaanwar.
Hard Disk partition- Batwara.
Hardware & Software - Ek duje ke liye.
Tempo rary file - Khote Sikkey.
Operator vs Computer - Meinkhiladi Tu Anadi

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Lifes like that..

TWO TOUGH QUESTIONS
Question 1:
If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids already, three who were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis, would you recommend that she have an abortion?

Read the next question before looking at the response for this one.

Question 2:

It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts. Here are the facts about the three candidates.

Candidate A
Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with astrologists. He's had two mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day.

Candidate B
He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps until noon, used opium in college and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening.

Candidate C
He is a decorated war hero. He's a vegetarian, doesn't smoke, drinks an occasional beer and never cheated on his wife.

Which of these candidates would be your choice?

Decide first... no peeking, then scroll down for the response.

**** **** **** **** **** **** **** **** ****

Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt.

Candidate B is Winston Churchill.

Candidate C is Adolph Hitler.

And, by the way, on your answer to the abortion question:

If you said YES . . .

. . . you just killed Beethoven.

Pretty interesting isn't it? Makes a person think before judging someone.

- LoveNismi ( Ansh Rav )

Tum Mujhko Achi lagti Ho

Ek Baat Kahoon Agar Sunti Ho?
Tum Mujhko Achi Lagti Ho,
Kuch Chanchal Si, Kuch Chup Chap Si,
Kuch Pagal Pagal Lagti Ho,
Hai Chahne Waale Aur Buhut Par,
Tum Mein Hai Ek Baat Bahut..
Tum Apni Apni Lagti Ho,
Ek Baat Kahoon Agar Sunti Ho?
Tum Mujhko Achi lagti ho,
Yeh Baat Baat Pe Kho Jaana,
Kuch Kehte Kehte Ruk Jaana,
Yeh Kis Uljhan Mein Rehti Ho.?
Kya Baat Hai HumSe Keh Daalo,
Ek Baat Kahoon Agar Sunti Ho?
Tum MujhKo Achi Lagti Ho.
- LoveNismi ( Ansh Rav )

ROMANTIC KISS

A kiss speaks many different meanings to its lover; when it is missing, many interpretations as to the reasons for its absence surface. These interpretations can become invisible wedges that prevent love from expressing.

When love is present, kissing is an important part of expressing that love. Pay attention to it. Breathe. Relax. Slow down. Concentrate and engage the electricity in your body.

Kissing does not always have to be a prelude to making love.

Happiness is like a kiss - in order to get any good out of it, you have to give it to someone else.

A kiss is a pleasant reminder that two heads are better than one.

This story from Pravda, the Russian News Service, shows that even in the former Soviet Union, couples are rediscovering what we refer to as "The Mighty Kiss".

In case you thought the kiss was little more than a "romantic handshake", we've decided to let you in on a little Russian research that shows that the kiss is so much more than a mere gateway to romantic expression. Here are just a few of the powerful effects the might kiss will have on you!

Kissing stabilizes cardiovascular activity, decreases high blood pressure, and lowers cholesterol.
Kissing prevents cavities and plaque build-up by stimulating saliva production while preventing gingivitis through the calcium present in saliva.

Kissing stimulates over 30 facial muscles which smoothes out skin and increase blood circulation to the face.

Kissing burns 12 calories per five-second episode and three passionate kisses a day will help you lose one pound!

Kissing prevents the formation of the stress hormone glucocorticoids which causes high blood pressure, muscle weakening and insomnia.

Kissing does its part to vaccinate people from new germs. Saliva contains bacteria, 80% of them are common to all people with 20% unique to each person. By sharing saliva with a partner, you are stimulating your immune system to respond to the different bacteria you are being exposed to. The result is that your immune system creates certain anti-bodies to these new bacteria, which in effect vaccinates you against these germs. This process is called cross-immunotherapy.

According to a study from the University of Leicester in England, couples whose lips are of a similar size are more likely to stay together. Researchers found that 88 percent of happy couples had lips that mirrored each other's. Well-matched lips also make for a synced-up smooch!

Finally, you may not be surprised to know that kissing offers an express analysis of genetic compatibility. While you are kissing, your brain conducts instant chemical analysis of your partner's saliva and issues a "verdict" of your genetic compatibility. Think about it. Don't you know much more about what you like or don't like in a person after one kiss? And kissing is much more fun than taking a relationship inventory!

Oh, did we mention kissing also cures hiccups?

The next time you want to give your sweetheart the perfect gift, may I suggest that you use your lips to speak to your sweetheart instead of your wallet. Actions speak louder than words!
Kiss someone you love today!

- LoveNismi ( Ansh Rav )

Akeli Zaat ke liye kainat kia mangu

BATA! RAAH_E_MOHABAT MEIN
CHALOON MAIN KIS TARAH,
TANHA BINA TERE MERE HAMDAM
CHALA MUJH SE NAHI JATA,
MERI KHUSHIYUN KE SAB KAHKAHE
TUMHARE BIN ADHOORE HAIN,
MERE SAPNE MERI RAATAIN
MERE SAB DIN ADHOORE HAIN,
MERA SAPNA HAQEEQAT MEIN
JO YUN TABDEEL HO JAE,
AGAR TUM A MILO MUJH SE
MERI TAKMEEL HO JAE.
Bichr gaya hai to uska sath kia mangu,
Zra C umr hai ghum se nijat kia mangu,
Woh sath hota to hoti Zaroorten bhi bohut,
Akeli Zaat ke liye kainat kia mangu.
- LoveNismi ( Ansh Rav )

Tum chaho to muje

Chaho To Mujhe
Apne Seene Mein Chupa Sakte Ho
Tum Chaho To Mujhe
Ail Ki Har Baat Bata Sakte Ho
Tum Chaho To Mujhe
Sahra Se Nikal Sakte Ho
Tum Chaho To Mujhe
Saiban De Sakte Ho
Tum Chaho To Mujhe
Tapti Dhoop Se Bacha Sakte Ho
Tum Chaho To Mujhe
Apne Wajood Mein Chhupa Sakte Ho
Tum Chaho To
Ik Diya Roshni Ka Jala Sakte Ho
Tumhain Malom Hai Ke
Yeh Zinadagi Kuch Dino Ki Hai
Tum Chaho To
Isey Hans Kar Guzar Sakte Ho
Tum Chaho To Mujhe
Apni Zindagi Bana Sakte Ho
Tum Chaho To Mujhe
Apne Seene Mein Chhupa Sakte Ho
Tum Chaho To Mujhe
Apne Dil Ki Har Baat Bata Sakte Ho
Tum Chaho To Kia Nahi Kar Sakte
Tum Chaho To Sub Kuch Kar Saktae Ho

- LoveNismi ( Ansh Rav )

Monday, February 23, 2009

Har ghadi

Har ghadi khud se ulajhna hai mukadar mera,
Main hi kashti hoon mujhme hai samundar mera,

Ek se ho gaye mousamon ke chehre saare,
Meri aankhon se kahi kho gaya manzar mera,

Kisse poochu ke kaha gum hoon kai barso se,
Har jagah dhoondta phirta hai mujhe ghar mera,

Mudadtein ho gayi ek khawaab sunehra dekhe,
Jagta rehta hai har neend mein bistar mera,

Har ghadi khud se ulajhna hai mukkadar mera,
Main hi kashti hoon mujhie mein hai sumandar mera.

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

Chinese to Chinese

Chinese speaking to a Chinese operator...
Caller: Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan?
Operator: Yes, you can speak to me.
Caller: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!
Operator: Yes I understand you want to speak to anyone. You can speak to me. Who is this?
Caller: I'm Sam Wan. And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It's urgent.
Operator: I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?
Caller: Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother Noe Wan was involved in an accident. Noe Wan got injured and now Noe Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital.
Operator: Look, if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!
Caller: You are so rude! Who are you?
Operator: I'm Saw Ree.
Caller: Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!
Operator: That's what I said. I'm Saw Ree..

- LoveNismi (Ansh Rav)

Aaj Dil Khol Ke Roya Hai

Aise chup hai ke yeh manzil bhi khadi ho jaise,
Tera milna bhi judai ki ghadi ho jaise,
Apne hi saaye se har gam laraz jata hu,
Raaste mein koyi deewaar khadi ho jaise,
Manzile door bhi hai manzile nazdeek bhi hai,
Apne hi paaoon mein zanjeer padi ho jaise,
Kitne nadaan hai tere bhulane wale ke tujhe,
Yaad karne ke liye umar padi ho jaise,
Aaj dil khol ke roya hai ramu to yuh Khush hai,
Chand lamho ki ye raahat bhi badi ho jaise.